Sunday, May 7, 2017

Dipping my toes in.

I am not getting up from this computer until something is written.

I guess that last sentence would have qualified, but I know that I want more. It's been a long hiatus, this blog and I- the longest it has ever been. It's high time that I found my way back.

In the nearly-a-year that it's been since I sat down in this space, there have been so many changes, both for me and my little family as a whole. The first change is that back in September we bought our first home. It was heart-wrenching to leave our little apartment and our little town. It was the place we began our marriage, where we brought home our newborn son. We had grown friendships and has always assumed it would be where we planted our permanent roots. But, our issues with the school district became too great to conquer. There was just no place for PJ.

So we packed up and moved 11 miles away, to a much bigger town with a much different vibe, but with a place for my son to learn. The move was hard on PJ. He was terribly homesick and it took a few months for him to feel better. September and October were hell- poor PJ would sob every day asking us to take him back to his old neighborhood. Every time he cried, I cried, and I cursed the broken school system that made it impossible for PJ to have a productive place in the school and with his peers. But, things slowly got better. He is enjoying school and has an interest in his new building, new friends, and the perks of having a much larger living space! He has been invited to birthday partied, enjoyed school events, and staked out some favorite spots in his new town ( like the kick-ass playground!).

As PJ has learned to spread his wings, I have needed to toss aside some of my own social anxieties and meet some people as well. It's not really my thing, thanks to my general awkwardness and dull social skills. But, I managed, enough to make at least one great friend, a bunch of potential great friends, and to be a productive part of the school parent community.

Now it is May, and we are planning PJ's first summer in his new town. For the first time since he was 2, PJ will not be spending his summer inside getting autism therapies. Instead, he will go to day camp, and (hopefully) enjoy his first "typical" summer. I wanted PJ to have time with his peers and, even though he will have the one-to-one support of his therapist, have a dirty, buggy, swim-y summer. We are also hoping for some beach time, some surfing time, and some family time. Lots of ice cream, lots of sun screen. I hope it's the summer I have always dreamed of for PJ. Thanks to our tax return, we can even pay for it!

It's bedtime. There is a busy week looming ahead and things to do before I sleep. For now, I will hit "Publish" on this wretched post. Day One. Thanks for having me.

"I feel like all my life I've tried to find the answers."