It's Sunday. It's the official first day of a new week, although Monday is generally where the action is. Sunday feels like the day before you give birth; you nest and prepare and think about the future and rest. Monday? Well, that's the day you're shoved into the cold, bright world to sink or swim.
Monday has always been something of a day of hopeful reincarnation for me. It's the day I try to reinvent myself. I suppose I could start a new habit on a random Wednesday, but Monday seems so fresh and new start-y somehow. New parenting technique? We'll get started on Monday. Finally going to start meal planning? First dinner served on Monday. Going to start a healthy diet? Cookies on Saturday, lettuce commence on Monday.
Snort. "Lettuce" commence. See what I did there?
I have all of these grand plans for Mondays. Sometimes they stick but, most of the time, they fall flat on their face. Last Monday was supposed to be my return to sticking to Weight Watchers. Sunday night, I figured out what I should eat for breakfast and planned to go to yoga class. Monday morning, I got PJ off to school, did some writing, and headed off to get my Zen on at yoga. Yoga was difficult because I am a clod, but I made it through and headed home where I promptly ate ALL OF THE THING because I forgot to eat breakfast and was starving. It's one of my worst habits, but instead of just dusting off and trying again that very day, I didn't really think about it until Sunday night.
The past few weeks have been crazy and complicated, in both good ways and bad, and I find myself here, on this Sunday, ready for a rebirth. I'm emboldened by my coffee and sitting here writing about it and it seems like the perfect time to write a list and get this shit done. But how to I get this stuff to stick? Some of the planning is great! Write goals, keep track of things, and make sure that my plans are attainable. What am I doing wrong? Expecting things to change overnight, giving up when I slip up, and thinking that Mondays are the only days to start traveling a new path.
This has been a time of revolutions for me. It must be because I'm approaching 40, or because I have finally reached high enough levels of coffee in my system to get my brain working as optimally as possible. Who knows? But, this is something that needs fixing, and I actually think it has as much to do with my follow through as it does when I start. So, perhaps, I'll pick one thing to work on at a time instead of thinking I can be reborn when Monday rolls around. And I'll make my changes start happening the second I think of them instead of waiting until Monday. And if I fall down, I can start again the very next moment. I'll just remember that there is room for rebirth in every day.