Friday, August 28, 2009

"All of this is more then I've ever known or seen..."

It is August 28th, and the summer is essentially over!

It went by in such a strange blur! At the start of the summer, I was still in my first trimester, Pete had justgraduated nursing school, I had a whole summer to look forward to with Ellie and Anna, and there were alot of decisions to be made!

And now here we are. I'm almost out of my second trimester, Pete's about to sit for his state certification, I had my last full day of summer vacation with the girls today, and a number of big decisions have been made!

The biggest decision is that I am going to stay home with PJ after his arrival,for as long as our finances and my sanity can handle it! After all, I've had at least one job, usually two jobs, since I was 16 years old! That said, this is our first child. We don't own a home yet, and live in a simple manner. This may be our only chance to have one of us stay home with our child(ren). By the time we are ready to further expand our family, we will hopefully own a home and have the larger expenses of raising a family, and it's likely I will need to go back to work. It's time I consider to be a gift and I can't wait to enjoy every second of it!

Of course, this decision meant that I had to tell my gals that I won't be their nanny anymore. They didn't seem too suprised- Ellie's 1st grade teacher just had a baby and explained to her class that she would not return to teaching upon the baby's arrival, so Ellie is under the impression that this is just the way of the world! That eased the news for now, although I figure that come November, I will realize just how hard it will be handing over the care of these gals to someone else! After four years, they feel a bit like quasi-daughters!

It's funny- I have been thinking about this summer, the way it has flown and the changes it has held, but it's nothing compared to how my life has changed during my almost four years with the girls. I started out in my own place, only to move back home at an age I never imagined I would be. I became enaged, got married, and now am preparing to have my first child. My sister was married, and Pete's family welcomed Emilia, Robbie, Thomas and James. I watched Greg suffer during a long illness and succumb to it 10 months later, and six months after that said goodbye to Mom-mom. Four years filled with so many terrible things and even more amazing blessings! Four years that sometimes feel like they have been a lifetime!!

Tonight, I sir here enjoying the rain and feeling a very active PJ scrabbling around inside of me,and I wonder how many lifetimes are ahead. Goodbye summer, hello, next chapter...

2 comments:

Shelly said...

yay for new beginnings--they can be hard but so good! praying for you friend! i enjoyed spending this summer with you!

jen said...

I haven't blogged or read any this summer with the move and trying to be with family, well, you know. I love reading your blog and this writing really touched me. It is hard for new beginnings. So much has changed in your life in such a short time. I have to say, and you know it the best is yet to come!